Sway, Covent Garden

When I’ve visited Sway’s bar in the past it has always been heaving so I was surprised to find a near-empty restaurant and similarly startled when I saw the menu. For such a central location, the prices were unusually low: around £6 for a burger, Caesar salad or fish and chips. Sure, the choices were uninspiring but with an additional 50% off all food deal, courtesy of toptable.co.uk, it felt a bit like eating in Primark – so cheap, it seemed churlish not to buy one of everything.

In the end, we ordered six tapas for £10 (should’ve been £20). The deep fried element was disappointing; we left most of our tempura ‘king’ prawns which were about as regal as a night out in Basildon, but we loved the humous, and the halloumi and grilled tomato skewers were a definite highlight.

The faintly disturbing WCs are worth a mention – as grotty as they come, finished off with a vase of tall, crumbling flowers that were so dead they’d started to smell. For a bargain bite pre-cinema, Sway was spot on, but if you’re a serious foodie or lean towards OCD when it comes to public facilities, stay away.

The Darjeeling Limited

Wes Anderson’s back catalogue is both impressive and a fraction weird, which, in this time of indentikit dross, is a splendid combo. Rushmore was interesting, The Royal Tenenbaums was striking and The Life Aquatic With Steve Zizzou was gorgeous but conceptually a bit too strange for my rigid imagination. Happily, The Darjeeling Limited, Anderson’s latest offering, is the best so far – by far.

Set in a somewhat romanticised north of India, the film sees three unlikely brothers taking a journey in search of spiritual contentment following the death of their father. All three of the leads perform exceptionally well but Owen Wilson deserves particular praise for his unapologetic personification of a manic control freak while Adrien Brody’s wonderful face deserves an Oscar in its own right. Natalie Portman’s cameo is predictably breath-taking and the use of Peter Sarstedt’s classic ballad is superb; the only slightly jarring moment was the otherwise enviable script’s final line which descended into unexpected Joey-and-Chandler-esque schmaltz.

Visually arresting, extremely funny and awash with men who are wonky but mouth-watering: what’s not to like? I haven’t enjoyed a film this much for aeons and recommend it with the proviso that you replicate my low expectations on arrival.